MAID/MATRON OF HONOR RESPONSIBILITIES

The maid or matron of honor is usually a sister or very close friend. Choose someone dependable.

Helps the bride with shopping, invitations and other details as requested
Attends all pre-wedding events
Pays for own wedding attire
Takes charge of groom's ring during ceremony
Witnesses, signs wedding certificate
Helps bride in arranging veil and dress at ceremony and reception
Returns bride's gown to designated place after wedding

The maid of Honor may plan your wedding and take care of details for you. If she lives nearby she might help address invitations, plan pre-wedding parties, make favors or table decorations, and keep track of gifts received and thank you cards sent. The maid of honor usually hosts a bridal shower. The bride can delegate care of bridesmaid's fittings and details. She attends pre-wedding parties. She attends the rehearsal and the rehearsal dinner.
The maid of honor helps the bride with dressing and assists with the, train, veil and holding the brides bouquet during the ceremony. The maid of honor wears the grooms ring on her thumb (or carries it in some other safe manner) until it is time for the blessing and exchange of rings in the ceremony. She is responsible for having an emergency kit with miscellaneous items such as a needle and thread, extra nylons, a roll of tape etc. The maid of honor holds on to a duplicate list of desired shots for the photographer and Videographer as well as a song list for ceremony musicians and a copy of any special prayers or readings to be used during the ceremony. She walks in front of the bride in the processional and with the best man in the recessional and stands near the bride at the altar. She makes sure that all of the bride's clothing, make-up and personal belongings are removed from the changing room at the ceremony site and taken back to the bride's home. She helps to line up bridesmaids for formal photographs.

The maid of Honor stands next to the groom in very formal receiving lines. The maid of honor is seated at the head table or table of honor. During the reception, she mingles with guest.She dances with the best man at the reception. She helps the bride with her train, fastening it to floor length so it is out of the way for dancing, if necessary. The maid of honor keeps a duplicate copy of the list of names and pronunciations for the bridal party announcements. She also keeps a duplicate song list for the reception musicians or disc jockey. If the bride needs assistance in tossing her bouquet or in gathering single women to catch it, the maid of honor can help out. If requested, she helps the bride dress for the honeymoon and makes sure the bridal gown and other personal clothing items are returned to the bride's home after the reception. She takes the bridal bouquet for preserving and may take the gown for heir looming while the bride is on her honeymoon

The maid or matron of honor pays for her own dress and other attire. If travel expenses are involved, she pays for her own way. Although she may attend several pre-wedding parties, only one shower gift and one wedding gift are to be expected. She may share the cost of bridal shower.

WHO PAYS FOR WHAT?

OKAY, THE REALLY BIG QUESTION? WHO PAYS FOR WHAT?
Working out a budget for your wedding is one of the first things that should be done, once the date is set. Will the ceremony be formal, semiformal or informal? Who pays for what? Unlike a decade ago, the lines are no longer rigidly drawn. Some modern social rules are obvious (no invitations, no exceptions) and some less so (pregnant brides/unwed mothers are not supposed to wear a veil).
There are no longer any hard and fast rules as to "Who Pays for What", but a general guideline follows as to the traditional breakdown:

Bride's Family:
All Reception Costs
Church Fees
Groom's Rings
Invitations
Flowers for Church, Bridesmaids and Reception
Music for Ceremony
Transportation for Bridal Party
Gifts for Bridal Party
Groom's Gift
Lodging for Bridesmaids, if necessary
Bridal Party:
Your Attire
The Shower
If you're from out-of-town, Transportation to the Town the wedding is in
Gift for the Couple
Groom's Family:
Bride's Ring
Clergy Fees
Bride's Bouquet, Corsages and Boutonnieres
Rehearsal Dinner
Transportation for Groomsmen
Gifts for Groomsmen
Bride's Gift
Lodging for Groomsmen, if necessary
Groomsmen:
Your Attire
The Stag
If you're from out-of-town, Transportation to the Town the wedding is in
Gift for the Couple

JUST A FEW RULES FOR THE GUESTS

* Don't assume that the couple knows you're coming to their wedding. You must send back your reply card before the "Reply by" date. Failing this simple task is incredibly rude and insensitive.
* If the invitation specifically states: “John Smith and Guest” then you may certainly bring someone. If the invitation is addressed to you and you only, you may not bring a guest. However, if you too have found The One and would like to bring him/her along, phone the bride and ask her permission. * If you have declined an invitation, you are not expected to send a gift.
* If you arrive at the church during the procession, you should wait until the bride has gone down the aisle before entering. Also, don't peek through the doors to watch because you'll be in her photos.
* If you are late for the ceremony, you should walk down an outside aisle and find a seat quickly and quietly.
* If you are of a different faith, you are not required to participate in the rituals, but if you want to that's fine.
* You have to buy the couple a gift.
* The gift should be something that they can both use.
* If you have sent a wedding gift through the mail, then you don't have to bring another one to the reception.
* It's wise to give a cash gift to couples that are getting married out-of-town because they will have to ship everything back home and that's an added cost to them.
* Many couples that have lived together for awhile will not register for gifts. That's because they already have everything they need. In this case, cash in a wedding card is appropriate.
* Guests pay for their own transportation and lodgings.

IF YOU'RE WEARING GLOVES

Gloves give your wedding attire such an elegant look. You can take them off sometime before you put on your wedding ring and hand them to your maid of honor. She'll give them back to you at an appropriate time. It's appropriate to wear your gloves in the receiving line and the first dance. When it comes time to eat and party, the gloves come off!

THE DREADED RECEPTION SEATING PLAN

* Don't seat battling relatives together.
* So that everyone has a good time, seat teens together, aunts and uncles together, etc. Try seating groups either by their relationship to you or by their ages.
* As for the head table, the rule has changed so often that there isn't one anymore. You and your better half can sit at a raised table with your wedding party below you. You can have your own table with a table on either side of you with your wedding party. You and your husband in the middle of a long table with men on one side and women on the other, or boy, girl, boy, girl. Parents and grandparents at the table or not, it's up to you.
* Stick to table numbers. Famous couples, places you've been, etc., are hard to see from across the room. We've heard many complaints by guests at weddings, when they have to search for their tables.
* Reserved tables are all you need. Why put yourself through the extra work of having a reserved chair for each guest? It just gives people something else to complain about.
* It's a good idea to have a "Reserved" card at the parents seats. They are the only ones that need preferred seating.

WEDDING GIFTS

Please keep this in mind when considering the wedding gift:
* It is considered rude to put "cash only gifts", or other wording meaning the same thing on the invitation.
* You're not supposed to put registry information on your wedding invitation. It's left up to friends and family to inform everyone. However, you can put gift information on an insert in your bridal shower invitations.
* If you have a personal wedding website with info for bridal party and guests (and gift registry info), you can include an insert with the link to your website in your wedding invitation.
* You're not required to open your gifts at the reception or in front of anyone.